This was the original start of the self-portrait on page 135. It exemplifies on one hand my mantra to start the finish then finish the start and although it was successful in this respect, it was badly placed—too far to the right and too low for the gesture and movement of the light to work.

It was most distressing. There seemed nothing to be done but wash it off and begin again. But before I managed to do that I felt a restraining hand upon my own. I looked up into the brown eyes of Sherrie McGraw and heard her voice importuning, “It’s still marvelous the way it is; save it and start anew.”

So there you have it—a start and the finish of a start. At the same time, I must insert a disclaimer: To start the finish of any painting, one must have the finish in mind! This does not necessarily mean one ‘sees’ the painting in one’s ‘head’ but that the concept, the idea, the finish, the matrix is there, and that is what is painted immediately. You go there first and stay with it until the end. The concept is the only thing to be painted, not the subject matter. The concept is abstract. It is a way to explore the elements, the tools of painting, the discipline, rather than just paint a picture of the subject matter.